Q: How many independent Baptists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Only one – any more than that and it might seem like an ecumenical activity.
Q: How many Presbyterians does it take to change a light bulb?
A: It doesn’t matter, as long as it’s done decently and in order.
Q: How many Unitarians does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Two. One to write a solemn statement which will affirm that: This light bulb
is natural, a part of the universe, and evolved over many years by small steps.
We affirm the right of all bulbs to screw into the sockets of their choice
regardless of the bulb’s illumination preference. And we seek for each light
bulb the fullest opportunity to develop itself to its full electrical
potential. The second Unitarian’s job is to read this statement, even if he or
she is the only human being to do so, and then write the obligatory criticism
and dissent.
Q: How many missions magazine editors does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Just one — they’re trained to bring light to a dark world.
Q: How many atheists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None – there’s no point, since atheists refuse to see the light.
Q: How many Quakers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Ten to sit around in a circle until one feels an inner light.
Q: How many Lutherans does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Thirteen – one to change the bulb and 12 to sit around talking about how
much they miss the old bulb.
Q: How many creationists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None – they just wait for God to say “Let there be light.”
Q: How many Calvinists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: If God has predestined the light bulb to shine, it will change itself.
Q: How many Brethren does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Change? What is this change you speak of?
Q: How many campfire worship leaders does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Just one, but soon all those around can warm up in its glowing.
______________________
(from the
Evangelical Press Association website)
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