WHAT EXACTLY IS MARRIAGE? "Marriage is when you get to keep your girl and don't have to give her back to her parents." (Eric, 6) "When somebody's been dating for a while, the boy might propose to the girl. He says to her, 'I'll take you for a whole life, or at least until we have kids and get divorced, but you got to do one...

- You've ever lied to the choir director about how good the cantata sounded. - Your wife has amassed a huge collection of unsolicited casserole recipes....

One Sunday during the evening service someone noticed their child entering zestfully into the singing of the chorus, "Soon and very soon /we are going to see the King..." Listening closer to their five year old they heard the words, "Soon and very soon / we are going to Burger King."