Sermon Illustrations

The week before Easter in Pampanga province in the Philippines, volunteers are crucified. Each remains on the cross for only a few minutes. The list of volunteers is so long that one must wait at least two years for a turn. The Catholic Archbishop said on national television. "Those who participate have their sins for the past year forgiven."

According to news reports, the International Journal of Epidemiology just published an article that maintains bored people die sooner than people who are excited about life. Britton and Shipley of the University of London did a study of more than 7,500 people. Those who reported that they were bored were 2.5 times more likely to die of a heart problem than those who were not bored.

A young boy had just gotten his driving permit. He asked his father, who was a minister, if they could discuss his use of the car. His father said to him, "I'll make a deal with you. You bring your grades up, study your Bible a little and get your hair cut; then we will talk about it."

A little boy named Danny lived with his family in a trailer. One day, someone asked him, "Don't you wish you had a real home?" Danny's reply was wise beyond his years. He said, "We have a real home. We just don't have a house to put it in."

The young couple invited their elderly pastor for Sunday dinner. While they were in the kitchen preparing the meal, the minister asked their son what they were having. "Goat," the little boy replied.

A group of 4-8 year olds was asked, "What does love mean?" Here are some of their answers:

Craig Brian Larson reminds us of the time that, "Not long ago, the world watched as three gray whales, icebound off Point Barrow, Alaska, floated battered and bloody, gasping for breath at a hole in the ice. Their only hope: somehow to be transported five miles past the ice pack to open sea. Rescuers began cutting a string of breathing holes about 20 yards apart in the six-inch-thick ice.

In his book Taking the Risk Out of Dying, Lee Griess reminds us of the cartoon strip, Calvin and Hobbes. Calvin is a little boy with an overactive imagination and a stuffed tiger, Hobbes, who comes to life as his imaginary friend. In one cartoon strip, Calvin turns to his friend Hobbes and says, "I feel bad I called Susie names and hurt her feelings. I'm sorry I did that."

Two older men are pushing their carts around Wal-Mart when they collide. The first old guy says to the second guy, "Sorry about that. I'm looking for my wife, and I guess I wasn't paying attention to where I was going."

Lent originally was established for new Christians, those who experienced a call. They were to spend 40 days and 40 nights preparing for their baptism. If at the end they still wanted to follow Jesus, then on Easter Eve they would be baptized as the sun was rising in the east, signaling the new day, the new era, inaugurated because of the Resurrection.