Sermon Illustrations

Dennis Miller said, "I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman where the Self Help section was. She said if she told me it would defeat the purpose."  

Dear Ann Landers: The letter from the woman married to the tightwad - she couldn't get an extra quarter out of him - reminded me of my wonderful aunt who was beautifully warmhearted and had a great sense of humor. Aunt "Emma" was married to a tightwad who was also a little strange. He made a good s

A fellow was found with a rope around his wrist, strung from a light fixture. His buddy cut him down and said, "What in the world are you doing?" "Committing suicide!" "Well, you should have put it around your neck if you really wanted to commit suicide." The fellow answered, "I tried it around my n

"I don't know what your destiny will be, but one thing I know: the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who have sought and found a way to serve." Albert Schweitzer  

In a cemetery in Hanover, Germany, is a grave on which were placed huge slabs of granite and marble cemented together and fastened with heavy steel clasps. It belongs to a woman who did not believe in the resurrection of the dead. Yet strangely, she directed in her will that her grave be made so sec

Probably the greatest book on fear ever written in this country was by Basil King and the title was The Conquest of Fear. Here is the quotation: "Go at it boldly, and you'll find unexpected forces closing round you and coming to your aid." Isn't that terrific? "Go at it boldly, and you'll find unexp

The human soul weighs 1/3,000th of an ounce! That's the astonishing claim of East German researchers who recently weighed more than 200 terminally ill patients just before, and immediately after their deaths. In each case the weight loss was exactly the same - 1/3,000th of an ounce. "The inescapab

We often put our affection of stuff that has a price tag. I read recently about an old, rich man with a cranky, miserable attitude who visited a Rabbi. The Rabbi was a simple man whose heart was right and he lived a simple life. They weren't together very long before the Rabbi got a wonderful idea

The folly of human nature is neatly summed up by the case of the middle-aged school teacher who invested her life savings in a business enterprise which had been elaborately explained to her by a swindler. When her investment disappeared and the wonderful dream was shattered, she went to the office

During the Arab-Israeli war of 1967 an American reporter was flying over the Sinai desert with an Israeli officer, and they spotted some fifty thousand stranded Egyptian soldiers who obviously were dying of thirst. When the situation was reported in the newspapers a number of world leaders and o